Doug gives full marks to Kylie. The miniature plastic diva decided not to jostle for space, and finish up on the *bottom* half of page 5, as second fiddle to a bald kid. Instead, she took the G8 resolutions right into our own pockets of poverty. Hiring a Learjet, she whipped up to the far northwest, and dropped in on a remote community. Ignoring the fleas and squalor, she cuddled up the nearest snotty infant, and made a solemn vow. Kylie will do all in her celebrity-rich power to see this child gets to complete secondary education. Kylie will also pay for all the health education needed to bring the whole community up to Ramsay Street standards. She could fail, but 18 years is a snip when you have had the world at your feet for that long. It's a fair exchange, and nothing less than we expect of a wholesome girl who hasn't exposed a single strand of pubic hair in public.

Doug loves to dress up in his air vice-marshall's kit. It brings on memory of the sweet savor of barbecued German civilians in Dresden, 1945. He was having a private session in the vice admiral's gear, recounting the drowning of Argentinians, when word came through of an urgent need to attend bedside photo shots for the regal album. He had to move quickly, Camilla had caught the scent and she was fulfilling her new duties on the trot. Luckily for Charles, her need to find a suitable bonnet got him out the door first. Good work by the Murdox, reminding us, again, of where our servility should be directed. Pop diva's bum, or fox-hunters nag, it's a close call. It's a good thing rich ladies are prepared to parade in their finery. One can take only so much exposure to dying black kids. The media are truly selfless servants of the people.

The PM's minders are vetting the Aussie victims in preparation for the Lords tour. Criteria are any of fair complexion, sporting prowess, family connections and privileged schooling. All of those, in a non-Irish package would bring out a sob or two. Those who need not apply include any with linkage to Australian drug-runners on death row in Asian prisons, or anyone with the name of Hicks. Short of an actual victim, the PM will accept a miracle survivor, preferably a Christian who changed places at the last minute with an infidel who was blown to shreds. It's a fact that, if any 'Christians' did lose their lives, closer inspection would reveal deep-seated character flaws, such as being green or gay.

Doug has sussed the reason for underdone media coverage of the event. The streets of London are so packed with agents of the new media, that bona fide news crews struggle to get through. Strict amateurs with camera-phones and iPods are eating the lunches of the 60 minutes mob. It simply takes too long to set up the lights and cameras, do the sound-checks, fix the face and hair of the gun reportress. In the time it takes to do one old-fashioned gut-wrencher at the bedside, an army of kids has been crawling through the wreckage, and sending snaps of the carnage direct to websites.

Meanwhile, the carnage in Iraq goes on, with no media coverage at all, thank goodness.

Doug reminds his subjects, that despite the benevolence of G8 "it isn't the end of poverty in Africa." Like, there's shiploads of precious metals, rare minerals and oil to be ripped out of it.

Kim Beazley's response was half-hearted. These terrorists are subhuman filth who must be captured and eliminated

But it was good to hear a flash of unreconstructed Moral Re-Armament sneaking through. Let's hope for more of the red-blooded Kim.

The 'subhuman' tag has used to refer to every 'other'.

On Filth, George Orwell had a few things to say, including this passage (original source not found)

John Chuckman: Drowning In Filth
"We are all drowning in filth. I feel that intellectual honesty and balanced judgement have simply disappeared from the face of the earth." - George Orwell (diary entry for 27 April, 1942)

If Kim went to the blogs, he would see how to lift his game, if he wants to compete with John's journal

With no publicly-discernable morals, values or mores, liberal-demokkkRATs are wildly floundering to re-establish and cement their position as obstructionist, America-hating, anti-US Military, liberal-progressive-demokkkRAT-socialist-commie-nazi-fascist, lowlife, subhuman, deviant, degenerate filth.

Detecting a slight lack of balance, and not pausing to reflect on what Kim would say about mass-murderer Martin Bryant, I went to Haruki Murakami's analysis of the sarin attacks on the Tokyo underground in 1995. I have posted an extract in the Forums, at Currently in the Media

What alternative is there to the media's "Us" versus "Them"? The danger is that if it is used to prop up this "righteous" position of "ours" all we will see from now on are ever more exacting and minute analyses of the "dirty" distortions in "their" thinking. Without some flexibility in our definitions we'll remain forever stuck with the same old knee-jerk reactions, or worse, slide into complete apathy.

Terrorists in Australia: Ruddock
"I've often said it's an unfinished canvass," he said.
"We endeavour to meet every potential risk but the reality is that with all that work, there may well be risks that you have not properly identified, people who have an intention to carry out terrorist acts that haven't become known to us."

The way to get going on this, Phil, is to canvass the right sort of opinions, eg from Southern Curse Lynchmobbing, finish your work on the canvas, tell the editors of White Pride to check their spelling, then kick down doors and MAKE ARRESTS.

Your public expects, nay, demands, you lock up the usual suspects, or any suspects named Habib or Hicks. Unless they are white, when they will have the full protection of George's Law, with their own choice of Gitmo or Cairo.

Labor has suggested bomb sniffer dogs patrol metropolitan rail networks in the wake of the London terrorist attacks, but Opposition homeland security spokesman Arch Bevis admitted there were not enough trained dogs in Australia to protect commuters. "Unfortunately, if we put all of the sniffer dogs in Australia together in the one place, it wouldn't be enough to protect the rail system in one of our major capital cities," he told ABC radio.

C'mon, Arch. You ought to be done for cruelty to animals. Fancy forcing dogs to shove their noses into the crotches of the great unwashed.