This is what victory looks like: an exhausted man cuddling puppies and inspecting a guitar factory. There are no more votes to be mopped up.Tony Abbott is going through the motions.

As a backdrop for a last press conference of the campaign he brought the cameras to Melbourne's Box Hill and "Maton Guitars Hand Made for the World Stage".

Politicians come here. In the hall of fame that is the Maton foyer there's a snap of John Howard with Lee Kernaghan. It's not a meeting of minds.Joe Hockey finds a poster of the Seekers. "Look, Tony, your favourite band."

Hockey plays kid brother. He looks fresh but admits to exhaustion. What does victory feel like? "Climbing Kilimanjaro." The same thing day after day: a long, hard slog to the summit.

Abbott is in the factory talking politics with guitar makers over the roar of the sanding machines. It's hardly likely Abbott PM will miss the factory visits he has made his trademark. How many hundred has he done denouncing the carbon tax? Today he's not hands-on. They don't let him near the guitars.

His eyes are exhausted. His shoes need a polish. He's so tired he seems to be listening to his own voice as the lines come out of his mouth. He spares us nothing: the waste will end; the boats will stop; the carbon tax will be scrapped. He's word perfect.

......

"These are all from the one litter, Janice?" asks Abbott, cuddling an eight-week old labrador pup for the cameras. There is a smell of dog piss in the air. No pups disgrace themselves in the arms of the politicians.

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/sep/06/tony-abbott-awaits-transformation-victory-election-2013

 

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Pups are more sensible than Abbott and Murdoch... At least the pups don't shit everywhere...

 

He’s not that good at keeping promises. He swore a vow of chastity. He squirmed out of his shotgun wedding. He stood up Bernie Banton, who had ‒ at some inconvenience ‒ come to his office to see him in the last week of his life. He agreed with his hero Howard that global warming was real then called it ‘crap’. He defended a convicted pederast, Nestor, in court, and got him out of prison.

He begged a friend of pederasts, Hollingworth, not to resign. He concealed, according to his uncontradicted biographer, acts of homosexual rape by trainee priests at St Barnabus’ — his college. He gave up the priesthood because his friends were making more money (so he told Annabel on Wednesday). He was elected Opposition Leader by Peter Slipper’s lone vote and went to his wedding. He turned up to the wedding 20 minutes late, leaving everyone waiting and Slipper’s bride in tears. He then tried to drive his “friend” to suicide. He ran from the chamber to refuse Craig Thomson’s vote, then later accepted it.

 

He employed David Oldfield, and snorkled with him, then tried to destroy him. He framed Pauline Hanson and put her in gaol until she was proved innocent and was let out. He did the same to her business partner David Ettridge. He alleged Cheryl Kernot was a pederast and ruined her.

Some of his closest allies were homosexual – Pearson, Pyne, Chifley, Nestor – but he won’t, if elected, let gays marry. He claims to love his sister but believes she will fry in hell for sinful practises if she does not repent them.

 

The worst he did was to Kathy Donnelly. He used no contraception with her. When she was pregnant, he agreed to marry her. The church was booked, the guests invited. A week before his vows, he decided to call it off, and trained for the priesthood. Scared to tell her, he asked his mother to make the call. Devastated, Kathy had the baby, a boy, and suckled him for five days. Then he was taken away by a Catholic agency and sent to Perth.

Ruined, she then became pregnant again, had another baby. Decided to keep this one, and raised him as an unwed mother. Abbott did not become a priest for another seven years, and after four years, during which he was ‘not as celibate as I should have been’, he gave it away.

 

He married, had three daughters and pined for the son he had not kept. The boy turned up as a sound man around Parliament house. Abbott embraced and acclaimed him. Kathy met him for the first time in twenty-six years. It then turned out he wasn’t Abbott’s son, but the by-blow of a one-night-stand. Kathy, disgraced, defended herself on national television. She soon grew ill, and began to die.

Abbott did not visit her deathbed, or call, or write to her. He did not go to her funeral. At the Apology For Forced Adoption, however, he praised her as the ‘finest person I ever knew’.

http://www.independentaustralia.net/2013/politics/tony-abbott-who-is-he/

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But really... how hard is it to keep promises when most of the grandiloquent ones Abbott has made in this election campaign were designed for him to lick the butts of the rich folk and that of Uncle Rupe exclusively?... Tony is not going to renege on the pledges, to become a socially aware Saint Benedictine, is he? The French have already made a reference to the victorious "Moine Fou" — the mad monk. The inference is far more seriously denigrating in that lingo than in the Aussie vernacular...

Oh, by the way, one has to say that Rudd's speech on defeat night was the most pathetic ever made by a politician here ... It was possibly written by a ten year old kid who had been given a chance to shake the sauce bottle for far more time than he should have...

Is this why most of the swinging voters — early in the campaign were prepared to accept him back in their heart — had enough time to see an erratic, useless, wind-bag with no grace to acknowledge Julia's work... ?

On the other side, Abbott's harangue was as boring as a lecture on how to draw lines in accountancy books and as acid as bat-shit rain in the Sydney botanical gardens — the crap that destroys the duco of cars.... But as good as Tony's word is crap, I believe he did not acknowledge the role of Turnbull nor that of Murdoch in his victory...

Hopefully the Labor party won't give Rudd the top job back and hopefully, his rancour and bile would have been completely excised from his shallow shifty-sand mud-flats resurrection, by now... 

In conclusion, One Labor party should not give one inch of concession on the repeal of the "carbon tax"... even if this means to commit suicide twice, as cocky Tony in his budgies crowed it would be...

 

 

 

Bob Ellis (in his article above: He's not that good at keeping promises) claims that "He begged a friend of pederasts, Hollingworth, not to resign."

After much painstaking research for accuracy, Gus believes that Bob meant "a friend of pedophiles". I can't find references to "pederasts" amongst the priests (and friends) Hollingworth was hiding from inquiries (though there could have been), but I found one proven pedophile priest who had become a bishop (and friend) and who by then was protected by Hollingworth from being investigated, while Hollingworth kept victim(s) at bay with semi-legal letters.... 

see also: http://www.yourdemocracy.net.au/drupal/node/26101#comment-28266

 

 

 

The Liberal Party had a secret campaign tool in the form of a personality diagnosis of Kevin Rudd which found him suffering from a disorder known as 'grandiose narcissism', writes The Australian Financial Review's Pamela Williams.
The unelectable man walked across the stage of a hotel ballroom. Against a backdrop of iridescent blue with four Australian flags, he claimed the prime ministership with a mandate the likes of which had not been won by Conservatives for 17 years.

Rudd was held together by one key strut: an absolute conviction of intellectual superiority over everyone else. 'Kick out that strut and he will collapse.' 

As Tony Abbott’s supporters screamed the room down at Sydney’s Four Season’s Hotel they also buried the last vestige of a terrible three year-experiment on the other side – a saga which had seen a Labor government destroy two of its own prime ministers before flaming out itself.

Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/federal-politics/federal-election-2013/grandiose-narcissist-the-secret-diagnosis-that-helped-bring-down-kevin-rudd-20130909-2tfum.html#ixzz2eOSrQe7S

Of course.... Well done... Bravo... As if we did not know this!... But the cake on top of the sour cream here is that ABBOTT IS ALSO IN THE SAME BOAT.
Abbott is a narcissist first class with budgies bulging in a full frontal. And we, the poor buggers — the voters with the most limited choice for PM in the history of this country — had to pick between some really low class acts, in which the narcissist who told the biggest porkies would win... Of course, Tony got the help of Mr Murdoch to tell enormous  porkies — Rupert being another narcissistic geezer, with a nasty desire to control the world like Brains, in "Spoofy" and Brains... Yes I know it's not Spoofy... It's...

 

Tony Abbott is promising again and again that he will lead a "methodical, measured, calm" government. But he's overlooking something. He's just finished writing a rip-roaring new guidebook on how to be a successful opposition.

It's the Abbott model of how to destroy a government. And guess what? The Labor party noticed.

Rule No. 1: Don't give the government a thing. Fight it up hill, down dale, day in day out. Be strident, be angry, be unreasonable. Apply maximum pressure and see what cracks.

Rule No. 2: Don't allow the government to control the narrative. Make a lot of noise. Fill the airwaves with angry dissent and maximum outrage. Generate an impression of disorder. If you control the narrative, you control the psychological battlespace.

Rule No. 3: Exploit the deadliest of all contemporary policy issues, the one that was central to the downfall of the last three prime ministers: climate change. This remains a potent issue and will remain so for years.

Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/national/abbotts-model-to-wreck-a-government-may-come-back-to-bite-him-20130913-2tqa7.html#ixzz2ergD5Eju

 

Former Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott has been promptly deported from England just daysafter recommending to European leaders to stop illegal aliens entering.

Mr Abbott was aggressively pummelled onto a waiting navy vessel bound for a small island in the Atlantic, where he will be processed formally in three to four years.

“I didn’t mean me,” Mr Abbott screamed as he was cast down to the steerage of the ship.

Prime Minister David Cameron watched Abbott’s banishing from the docks of Brighton before addressing a shocked media.

“Mr Abbott made some very sound points, very sound points we simply couldn’t ignore,” Mr Cameron said.

“He told us very clearly not to accept people of shady and possibly even criminal leanings to dare step foot on our shores and I, for one, want to thank Mr Abbott for illustrating this point so clearly. I'm not sure about anybody else but I certainly feel a lot cleaner now that Tony is gone.”

Closer to home, the question has moved to what will become of the former prime minister, now that he is indefinitely detained in a small refugee camp on the island of St Helena.

According to a Roy Morgan poll conducted this morning, 89% of Australians would like to see Mr Abbott properly processed on the island for at least three years to ascertain whether or not he is a genuine threat to our national security. The same poll also suggested a further 93% of respondents would like to see him horsewhipped for the attempted knighting of Prince Philip.

Adam Bishop is editor for an satirical website The Fault Report — where nine out of ten readers can't tell the difference. You can follow TFR on Twitter @TheFaultReport.

 

See also:

https://independentaustralia.net/life/life-display/europe-takes-abbotts-advice-and-deports-him,8336

 

and of course read from the top toon down...