Friday 3rd of April 2020

Richard Tonkin's blog

The Walking Dream

It's Monday of Week Two
of the Walking Dream
When you wake up
you're still inside it
Sitting on the loo
counting your rolls
It's reality
your mind's denied it

Five At A Wedding

FiveFive Five at a wedding, Ten at a Funeral
Gathering in public is gone
A very different way of life
we're living from here on
Go a

The Time Of Your Wife

As I roved out on a Monday Night
a-running from my wife
I tried to find a place to hide
and not get into strife
but Adelaide on Monday Night
has only bars with pokies
or, if you're really lucky
quiz nights and karaokes

Dancing the Schadenfreude Waltz

I've thought up a point of view
I've found a headline of proof
All that's needed, isn't it?
Never mind the truth
I read it on the internet
made me want to cry
Doesn't really matter
who wrote

Dancing the Schadenfreude Waltz

I've thought up a point of view
I've found a headline of proof
All that's needed, isn't it?
Never mind the truth
I read it on the internet
made me want to cry

Running With The Sheep

Some people pray
that death is a cabaret
Other folks reckon
that life is an abattoir
On the same bus
we ride without reason
running with the sheep
wishing on a star

CH: Running with the sheep
searching together
hoping to find
sunnier weather
Running with the sheep
wishing on a star
A door's not a door
when it's still ajar

Bye Bye Bridget

Pack up all my bats and balls
Conflict of disclosure calls
Bye bye Bridget
ScoMo's not a happy chap
doesn't like this kind of crap

The Woolworths Warrior

His shirt is pressed-and-crispy white
his back is straight, his spinchter tight
He marches the length of his domain
from Aldi to Woolies and back again

If felons come, he'll catch them all
with luck, some terrorists might call
Battle plans and gunfire sound in his brain
from Aldi to Woolies and back again

He didn't make the Army, couldn't be a cop
so here his wartime career will stop
Waiting to be wanted, he marches in vain
from Aldi to Woolies and back again

Substantiation

Twenty Twelve came and went
Talk of Armageddon
little more than grump
Twenty Twenty comes to hand
Our PM's Pentecostal

True Blue Hawaii

The sky is blue in Blue Hawaii
not smokey brown from fires like in Sydney
Dreams come true in Blue Hawaii
there's no Climate Change on my hotel TV

Don't follow me, as I run away across the sea
to shelter 'neath the US Presidency
PM Screwed By Blue Hawaii
that's how history will remember me

Where The Bloody Hell Are Ya, Scott?

Could I be the only one
that finds our PM strange
in the manner that he dodges any
talk of Climate Change?
Across near half Australia

Horsemen Long Gone

I was born on Cup Day
The year Lightfingers won
and Jeanie Shrimpton wore a skirt
that bared her legs in the sun
My grandpop was an extra
in Fifty Thousand Horsemen
Light Horse Captain in real life
and all his horses loved him.

He rode a horse into a bar
He knew without a doubt
that seeing as he owned the pub
he wouldn't get thrown out.
He listened to the races,
had a little bet each day
Knew the trainers, jockeys too
and their journeys to today

Another Drunk Abo

Asleep on the floor with a pup in his arms 
in the free tram heading for town
The driver told him he'd have to get up 
as he gazed on him with a frown
As the tram trundled he got to a seat
and muttered while resting there
"Excuse me, will this give me a ride
across to Victoria Square?

Circle Of Life

"Tax cuts, tax cuts, vote me in"
said Scomo with a boyish grin
Hip pocket nerves Australia-wide
twitched with predictability
Three days after ScoMo glory

Telling Tomorrow Today

I'm ScoMo PM of the Future, 
telling tomorrow today.
My faith is like a suture, 
I Pray II'll never fray.

I've put the budget back in black- at least I will next year
Abracadabra, vote for me now
What could there be to fear?

Global debt's doubled last decade
20 trillion dollars or so
How are we to pay the price
with interest rates so low?

I've put the budget back in black- at least I will next year
Abracadabra, vote for me now
What could there be to fear?

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